Saturday, May 21, 2011

Milk delivery... Maybe, Maybe Not


On Monday, I was sad. I was praying for a fast and full delivery of milk!

Tula is 8 and a half months, and breast feeding has been (still is) an awesome journey. I have been so blessed to be able to start nursing right away with no complications like I had with Ivy. I have enjoyed every moment nursing and have been thankful for those quiet times with her. It has been a sacrifice- to be the only one up at night time feedings, to be the one sitting in a dusty utility closet twice a day at work, and to not be able to do things like fit into my old clothes, wear pretty bras, and run like I used to! But every bit has been worth it :)

I was sad on Monday because over the last few weeks I have watched my milk supply drop a bit. I think it is largely due to a bad cold (now sinus infection) that Tula has been plagued with, coupled with her dropping night time feedings (a blessing)! However, I have been concerned with the smaller amount that I am producing at work. On Monday, I was 3 oz. short which was not a problem since I have frozen milk but the problem was that I had NO new milk when I got home and it was time to feed my baby. With a heavy heart and tears from her, I prepared the first bottle I have ever fed her- but she took it wonderfully! For that, I was so thankful! She was flexible and let me feed her in this new way.

I talked to the lovely lactation ladies- who have been a great support- and they assured me that a drop in supply was fairly normal at this stage in nursing. They gave me some suggestions and encouragement- some that I will take and some that I will leave. In the end, this is my new plan- since you know I have a "plan" for everything!

I am mixing her bottles at the sitters half milk and half formula- which Tula is tolerating beautifully- thank you, Jesus, for being faithful again during this transition! I have dropped to pumping once at work so that I will be able to nurse Tula when I get home- since I would rather nurse than pump ANY day of the week. And I only have 8 and a half more days of the school year! Goodbye dusty closet- you will not be missed for my daily meetings with the "milk man"!

During the summer I will continue to listen to my body and Tula's responses as to when she needs more than I can make. I am now at total peace with this process. I think this may be an answer to an unspoken prayer- because I might have had trouble letting go of this time with Tula. I also know our little girl is about to have a mouthful of teeth- which frightens me, to be honest. And last, I think starting to do less nursing more bottle feeding will help Tula with the introduction to the sippy cup- which is a total fail at this point!

Overall, I am embracing my loose "plan" that could change tomorrow. Uncertainty is scary to me... but I know this is part of nursing. You don't know how much milk they get, what foods your eating that may upset their little tummies, and how your supply changes overtime. I am leaning into God as I have since being pregnant the second time around. Praying that I would be able to nurse her and boy, has He been faithful. I know either way I will be able to provide my girl with the nourishment she needs- bottle or boob- and in the end, that is all that matters!

Cheers to feeding your baby.... and that is that!